Its summer time

Yep, sure is. I have enjoyed my time this summer. Not worrying about hair and just being free. That's me you know. Free. Started working on my book :o). Oh I didn't tell anyone, did I. Kinda kept that tidbit to myself cause, just because. It's not like I really care what people have to say, it's more or less, I don't want you raining on my parade. If I'm joyful Imma stay joyful. Don't feel like hearing all of the nag negative not so nice remarks. Kids are good, my oldest is stressing me, but i have handed him right back to his creator, Almighty, all knowing, God. I have done my part as a parent, what else can I do? Nothing but pray. He's a GROWN man. He is not a child anymore. I can try to guide and give advice, but when you don't want the guidance or the advice, what can ya do? Nada. Nuff said. Love you baby boy. That is for real. Anyhoo, hair is doing well! Majority of the warm months has been dedicated to just washing and going. I think, now, don't hold me to it, but I think the last time I twisted my hair was when me and boo went for our pictures.... Hmmm. I think that is it. Well, I broke down and twisted last of June. Went like 12 weeks. Can you believe that? Not trying to put a particular timeframe on twisting, just didnt feel like doing it... Felt good just washing and going, or washing and then rolling, but no twisting. I'm pleased. :o) I am going to attach a little bit of my book for you to sample. Let me know what you think... If its negative, its still all good... :o) Love Peace and Happiness! ~Fe~

Excerpt from my "book"...... :o)

I sat in bed filing my nails, listening to the TV. Nothing good was on, but decided to leave it on the TV guide channel anyway, just to hear the noise.

"Baby, I want to talk to you."
"What about?"
"Its about us, and what has happened to us….."

It was raining like cats and dogs that day. I was determined to get to where I needed to be; where I wanted to be at the moment. The traffic was at a slow snarl, but determination and lust will get you where you want to be. Damn, I missed my turn, or did I just exit too soon. I gotta call and let him know where I am. Don’t want him to think I’m not coming. Let me get through this first light and then I’ll call. I don’t know where the hell I am.
"Hey, it’s me."
"Where are you?"
"I think I am lost. I am at the corner of Bragg and Lucas."
"Oh baby, you are at the wrong end. You need to trun around and come back down Bragg then turn right on Oleander. How did you get mixed up?"
"I don’t know. The rain, my thoughts, everything just kind of ran together."
"Do you want me to come and get you."
"No, I can find you. Just stay put. I’ll be there in a few."
I turned my car around and went back down Bragg. I saw Oleander Street before. I knew I should have gone down that street, but something inside me told me to keep going. I should have listened to my inner being. She always tries to tell me what is right from wrong, but I seem to always out talk her.

"Ok, so turn right on Oleander, now what am I supposed to do." I fumbled on my passenger seat for my laptop with the mapquest directions.

Mental note, I have got to get this navigation system going. There is no need to have it and I am still using mapquest.

"Ok, lets see the house number is 7854 Oleander."

I look at the houses on the street and am impressed. All brick, three story homes with black gates surrounding the properties. Impressive. I see Edward has done well for himself throughout the years. Very impressive. I pull onto the driveway and before I can ring the buzzer to announce my presence the gate opens. Very impressive. Not impressive enough to get me back though. As I drive down the driveway, I am mentally checking myself. Be sure not to sound unsure of yourself, be sure to be stern, be sure to put it all on the line. This will definitely be the end to this nonsense.

"You arrived safely, I’m glad."
Man that baritone voice is so convincing, so soothing, so right.
"Yes, I am here. I’m so sorry that it took me so long. The traffic is terrible. The rain is making it almost impossible to go any faster than 45 and that’s on the highway."
"It’s okay, love. I just wanted you to be safe. We have time, there is no need to rush."
His thoughfulness is what always got me. Always looking out for me, or was he really?
"Are you hungry, have you already eaten? We can go out if you want, if that is what you really want, or I can have something delivered."
He always has to throw in a side thought, .. if that is what you really want.. my ass..
"No, I am okay. My stomach doesn’t feel much like food right now anyway."
He grabs my hand and leads me into the grand room.
"Oh, Edward, this is absolutely beautiful. The décor is wonderful."
"Thank you, love. I did it all myself. I need to give you a tour. Come, let me show you around."

As he begins to talk about the different décors in each room on the ground floor, I tune him out completely. Right about now he sounds like the teacher from Charlie Brown. I don’t understand a word he is saying, but I am acting as if I am listening. Right now, I am having a conversation with my internal being.
"You know you need to leave. Whatever you need to say can be said over the phone. There is no need for this. Leave. Now."
"I can handle Edward, and I can handle myself. We are more mature now, and we are not driven by desire."
"No, you need to leave. Forget you ever came here, just leave."
"I am ok. Now leave me be so that I can finish the tour . I am quite impressed with what he has done."
Right at that moment, I realize that he has taken me to the third level of his home, and I am looking at myself. Hanging on the wall is a picture of me dressed in all white holding my sandals, walking along the beach. I remember that day oh so well, but I do not remember my picture being taken. The breeze is blowing through my hair and I am absolutely breathtaking. I remember how I was so ashamed of my skin complexion and longed for a lighter shade. But looking at this picture, with my ebony skin exposed against the white fabric, it was beautiful. I was beautiful.

"Oh, Edward, that is lovely. Where in the world did you get that picture.'
"Remember the last trip we took to the beach and you left for your daily walk. I hired someone the day before to follow you and take different shots of you while you walked. I have an entire photo album with you at the beach that evening, but this was my favorite. I had it blown to poster size, matted and framed. I knew you would come back to me one day. I knew it. I wanted to have it waiting for you. Remember ,I always told you to love your blackness. I wanted you to see for yourself what I see. You are truly beautiful."

With that comment, I stepped away. I felt the heat rising. The heat that I had extinguished so long ago. It was taking me over and I had to get away before the flame ignited again.

"Edward, please. Don’t."
"No, Jade, you are, you are truly beautiful. I’m sorry if I make you feel uncomfortable, but this is how I feel. All of this is for you. The home, the grounds, everything is for you."
"Edward, please." I whispered.
There goes the cinder. It has started to catch flame. My inner being is telling me, whispering in my ear, "Jade, please listen to me and leave. I told you earlier to leave, now look."
I wished, as always, that I had listened to her. It was too late. The fire had started, and the only way it would be extinguished was by him.
I squirmed trying to make reason of what was truly happening. Trying to get my head straight. I needed to think clearly. The thoughts came, but were cloudy. Edward took me in his arms and whispered in my ear,

"I never stopped loving you, Jade. Never."
I pulled away and looked at his gorgeous face.

" I know, Edward, but this is not right. I came here today to talk to you. To reason with you. I just want answers, that’s all. Why can’t you just give me answers?"
"Jade, I will answer any question you have. Just come to me. Stay with me. Love me the way you used to. You complete me, Jade. I didn’t know it then, but I know it now........."

Well, there you have it. It has been started and I will complete it one day. LOL. What do I know about writing a book? Nada. But it is on my, To Do list of things while I still have my right mind, list. :o) I have never been a romance novel type of person, but when I started typing it just came out that way. Thats just a snipit of it. There are a whole lotta pages. Just wanted to give you a little taste, thats all. Just like a man though(some men) got a good thang and don't know it till the good thang is gone... Oh well, I hope things work out for Jade.... Peace, until the next time!

Long time coming

Curlz holding strong for 3 wks.

Just a pin up
Showing a comparison of my "pony" from March 08 to May 08
Semi curld....

It has been 2 months since I have posted to my blog. For shame Fe! That is really pitiful. At any rate, a lot has transpired with my men in my life and that is one of the reasons why I have not been that active on my blog or my fotki for that matter. However, all thingz will be ok for me, I know it will. I am not fretting or anything. This too shall pass. Well, as of 5.28.08 I have loced, dreadloced, whatever for an entire 16 months! I haven't really taken any new pictures or anything, but that will be coming up at the 18 month mark. (July 28) I am very excited about making it to that mark, why???? Cause then I will only have 6 more months and I will be loced, dreadloced, whatever, for 2 yrs!!!! Hoody hoo!!!
I have had a mishap, but I haven't stressed about it too much because it was out of stupidity that it happened. I was messing w/one of my combined locs that had a hole in it. Now instead of letting it be, I decided to just split it. Well the split led to a cut so I have 2 really short locs on the back right side of my head. Its all good. I'll just let them do what they are gonna do. Good enough for me. Shoulda let it be.. Anyhoo, Thats about it... Have a GREAT One! ~Fe~

Ok, I broke down and retwisted my locs after a long break. We had our appt to get our portraits done on sunday, Mar 9, so I decided instead of washing and rolling I would wash, retwist and roll. The hair came out quite nice, as did the portraits. We did a formal sitting and then a casual sitting. My favorites are the casuals. We are going to take the little ones to get theirs done next week, and then the whole family shabang after that. Here's one of the casuals. I guess because it is from a portrait studio it won't allow you to click on it and enlarge it. Any hoo, this is me and my boo. April 20 we will be legal for 12 yrs, ya'll! Smooches! Have a Happy Friday!

Ho hum

Just in a ho hum kinda mood right now. Update on locs: still no curlz, still no retwist. Been kinda lazy in that area. Still just doing my wash and go. My locs were really crunchy feeling so I did a good clarifying wash, acv soak and condition. Honestly, they felt like straw! But after all of that good ole attention, I got them feeling extra pull em soft.. :o) So lets see, I havent twisted since around Jan 9 or so, and it is now Mar 5, so I am headed into that 8 wk realm. Its all good. I may twist for Easter, then again I may not. Me and hub dubs are headed to the studio to take some portraits for our upcoming anniversary. 12 yrs of marital bliss. Sooo for the weekend,I am going to curl really nice for the portrait. Been together much longer than that though. 12 yrs is a loooong time to make it in a marriage this day and age. I am very proud of us. Prior to us becoming legal we dated for many yrs. So we have almost 20 yrs together! Can you believe it! Thats my boo and wouldnt exchange him for anyone else in this ole world.. As Crazy as I am about LL and Vin Diesel, they could knock my door down and say ,"come to me", and I would be like, thank you , but I better stick with what I know. I have mucho amor para mi marido! Who would know me better? He helps to balance me.. You know. Smooches to my boo!

For the free flowin....

Just thought I would show I am still a no curls kinda girl... :o) I can do it!

Me in Rare form.....

Here I am in the straightness. I am forever curling my hair,but decided to freeflow it for a while. This winter weather is reaking so much havoc on my locs! Wearing hats with curls tend to smash my curls and then I gotta go in the bathroom refluff and restyle.... Too much work... Anyhoo, I washed like regular, conditioned, oiled, shake, shake, shake and allowed them to airdry. Started to roll and just said nah. Decided to just pin a few down so they wouldnt stick straight out and went to bed. Got up and let the shower do a little misting, shake, shake, shake, and went on my way.... I was happy with the end result. Now if I could only get my hair to grow all together and not in layers I would be estatic.... the ones in the back really aren't that scraggly, but the other layer is in my collar. Didnt flip em out before I took the picture. :o) Oh, and just so you will know, I have not twisted my hair since like January 9 or somewhere along in there. I like it like that too. Love the mainucured scalp look at times and other times I want fullness. Something that I have noticed is that even though I combined my locs they are still small. Its like they were never combined???? Now I have read somewhere along the way that the locs swell, condense and then swell again?? Any veterans that are reading this can correct me. I have maybe one or two that are still fat. I REALLY love those.. *sighing* Overall, I am still loving my locs, ya'll. :o) Oh and just so you know, I have been TAGGED! I am still tweaking that post. Trying to figure out how I can link the taggers in my post and not necessarily put them on the side w/ my other links. I would love for people to be able to just click their name in the post and go straight to their blog. Anyhooooooo, I'll get that post up very very soon..... Have a GREAT Tuesday!
Grace and Peace,
~Fe~

I made it!

Well, yesterday was my 1 yr locday! I made it peeps. I don't know I thought it would be magical or something, but it wasnt.:) I guess that is what happens when you read too many loc blogs and stalk too many loc albums. Perhaps it is just the fact that I toughed it out for 1 whole yr. Its like if I can do that, I can do anything.:o) At any rate, I am happy that my locs are officially 1 and I can now look forward to what lies ahead. Its like the months leading to a yr are in the blind, but now I feel like the months after this yr mark are going to be eyes wide open, ya know. My routine hasn't changed much from the beginning. I think the only thing that I do differently now is that I only twist between every 4 to 8 weeks, and I do use an ACV rinse, and CONDITIONER faithfully. In the beginning, I would wash every 2 weeks and retwist when I washed. I stayed away from conditioner because "hairboards said" to stay away in the beginning. I really realized that my hair is my hair and I know what my hair likes. My hair loves conditioner, and guess what still does even in the loced state. Ok, so let me give a recap of the last yr in locs:

`I started my locs Jan 28 2007
~I combined my locs in September 2007
~In December 2007 I separated 2 of my combined locs( they were HUGE)
~I have maintained my locs my palmrolling. I tried latching, but it just wasnt for me
~I began styling my locs as of day 1. Rolled em w/ perm rollers and have been doing it every since
~ Prior to locing my hair, I dyed my hair a red color, but have not done so since. I have never really been a "color" person, but I wanted to do something new w/ the birth of my locs. :o)
~At month 4, my locs ceased unraveling during my wash
~I was 99.9 % totally loced by 7 months
~In Jan 2008 I combined 4 more thin locs and allowed them to remain as 2 heads
~I busted up a loc in the back that was really really long,(longer than all other locs) but not totally loced and wrapped the remaining hairs around 3 adjacent locs
~My locs love conditioner
~My scalp loves to be oiled (always has and I think will continue)
~I use a creme base product to retwist my locs sometimes
~I use Nature's Blessing to retwist a lot(unless I am out)
~I wash when I want and as rough as I want. My scalp loves a good beat down :o)
~I retwist once every month or 2 (4-8wks)
~My hubby loooooooves ooh la la la to massage my scalp. (When I was a permie, he NEVA did that! I wonder if its because I gave him that you betta NOT mess up my hair look) lol
~My sons think it is so righteous that their mom is loced. They send their friends to me to wash and retwist their hair.. :o)
~I don't cover my hair at night. I just sleep on a pillow that has an old slip over it as a pillowcase. :O) ha ha ha Hey it works for ME!
~I stopped reading a whole lot of hair boards about waht to do and what not to do. In all honesty it made the process a little more than it needed to be..... nuff said
~I stoppped buying every single thing I read about locs and what was good for em. What works for you may not work for me. I am happy with the products that I have found to work for me and thats it. Just another way to get me spend UNNECESSARY money!
~ My staple products are as follows:
*White Rain regular shampoo (its clear JUST like suave clarifying)
* Suave coconut shampoo
*Suave coconut conditioner
*Apple cider vinegar (even though the white does just as good)
*Isoplus molding creme
*Natures Blessing hair pomade (when I have it)
~I used to use these products, but just decided it was too much of a hassle trying to keep up w/ the "hair joneses"
* rosemary e/o
* castor oil
*aloe vera juice
* any and all Jamaican Mango product.
~Now in all honesty, I will go back to the castor oil and the aloe vera juice when the weather warms up. I used that in a water bottle in the summer and my hair loved it, so I guess they could be put into seasonal rotation. :o) The rosemary is ok. I spent too much $ to just throw it away, so I guess I'll go back to it eventually????? One thing about it, my hair will grow at its own pace. I have never had a problem w/ growth, so I dont even know WHY I was trippin about it growing w/ locs...... Any hoo, thats that. I love my locs and think they fit me/personality more so than ANYthing I have EVER dont to my hair. Do I feel more spiritual? No,Do I feel more empowered, sorta. Its a commitment, and its not something that you will gain overnight...I am proud of my accomplishments thus far cause I know it took some perservering just to get to this point. So with that, I shall loc on....Hope that you have a GREAT Tuesday!
Grace and Peace,
~Fe~